Yesterday was my son's First Reconciliation (congratulations Theodore!). We don't usually take Veronica to church for fear of germs and RSV, but we made an exception for this special occasion - and we tried to sit away from others, with our sanitizer in hand. While at church, we ran in to Father Rogers, the priest who baptized Veronica. Father Rogers left our parish in June so he hadn't seen Veronica since he baptized her in April, on her second day of life. He marveled at how much she has changed and he seem genuinely moved by her progress. It was a special moment for us and brought back memories of her baptism.
We chose to have Veronica baptized on her second day of life because at that point, we didn't know what the future might hold. It wasn't as though we were expecting her not to survive; we just didn't know. The baptism was an emotional experience to say the least and obviously quite different from the baptisms of our other children. Father Rogers wore sterile gloves and a gown and used sterile water. Veronica didn't wear the same baptismal gown that her siblings wore, the one my mother-in-law made from my wedding gown. There were no family members with us to celebrate and no party afterwards. While I cried just as I did for the baptisms of my other children, the tears I cried for Veronica's were tears from completely different emotions. Part of me mourns the loss of that experience for Veronica and for ourselves, but I don't regret the decision we made. I know there will be plenty of other wonderful moments and occasions in her life that we will get to celebrate.
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We almost had Pierce baptized when he was 4 days old... he was so sick and they really didn't expect him to make it. I was so torn- part of me wanted to have that experience with him, but the other part felt like I needed to hold on to the hope that he was staying with us. Needless to say, I'm thrilled to be planning his baptism in the spring! I totally understand what you're saying though, about grieving for those "missed" or extremely different milestones.
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